Going there and getting lost
I can't help but feel a parallel between Royer a hundred years ago and my own experience going out West with my daughters to be part of a project with little or no experience. Admittedly, the comparison requires a little stretch of the imagination.
Yesterday, we arrived in Regina. Kathleen came to pick us up, showed us around her (beautiful) house, give us the keys and now we are just hanging out.
Journal of journey. Moving through, navigating the unknown. Tying my experience with that of the prioneers. Because I AM lost.
In the house, I look for little things. Yesterday, it was garlic. I looked everywhere. I refused to think Kathleen could live without garlic. I was right. Garlic is the first thing I found as I was looking for coffee filters. Finding something might start with letting go of the NEED to find it right away, bad habit of instant gratification. It could mean surrendering patiently to the great unknown (even if that is a kitchen) to watch it materialize later, in its own time, maybe perhaps in a different shape we had anticipated?
It could mean doing things differently. I made an espresso coffee instead. It was amazingly good.
However, I still don't know WHERE I am. Okay, I know I'm in Regina. "Philinstone" street is out front: it's busy, there are traffic lights and traffic. There is a school up the street and a park down the alley on the other side. I looked up "Philinstone" on the map of the phone book. It doesn't exist. How can that be? Can't look up the Internet. I don't want to bug Kathleen. I struggle in the uncertainty. I spend twenty minutes squinting at the maps and index of the phone book. To no avail. I need glasses: this has become a clear conclusion.
I was searching, trying to remember where we were from the University, feeling panic, anticipating "lost" time, feeling impatient, frustrated... It is after all 2008, no 1908: they had reasons to get lost; I didn't have any.
And then, I thought with a renewed sense of peace that it would be nice to GET lost, walk aimlessly, find whatever comes our way... Because we are in a city. We will definitely find people and places.
I better quit whining, because really, I am not lost.
I am not on a schedule: I have nothing better to do than discover... with my kids. They'll learn the joy of walking.
Yesterday, we arrived in Regina. Kathleen came to pick us up, showed us around her (beautiful) house, give us the keys and now we are just hanging out.
Journal of journey. Moving through, navigating the unknown. Tying my experience with that of the prioneers. Because I AM lost.
In the house, I look for little things. Yesterday, it was garlic. I looked everywhere. I refused to think Kathleen could live without garlic. I was right. Garlic is the first thing I found as I was looking for coffee filters. Finding something might start with letting go of the NEED to find it right away, bad habit of instant gratification. It could mean surrendering patiently to the great unknown (even if that is a kitchen) to watch it materialize later, in its own time, maybe perhaps in a different shape we had anticipated?
It could mean doing things differently. I made an espresso coffee instead. It was amazingly good.
However, I still don't know WHERE I am. Okay, I know I'm in Regina. "Philinstone" street is out front: it's busy, there are traffic lights and traffic. There is a school up the street and a park down the alley on the other side. I looked up "Philinstone" on the map of the phone book. It doesn't exist. How can that be? Can't look up the Internet. I don't want to bug Kathleen. I struggle in the uncertainty. I spend twenty minutes squinting at the maps and index of the phone book. To no avail. I need glasses: this has become a clear conclusion.
I was searching, trying to remember where we were from the University, feeling panic, anticipating "lost" time, feeling impatient, frustrated... It is after all 2008, no 1908: they had reasons to get lost; I didn't have any.
And then, I thought with a renewed sense of peace that it would be nice to GET lost, walk aimlessly, find whatever comes our way... Because we are in a city. We will definitely find people and places.
I better quit whining, because really, I am not lost.
I am not on a schedule: I have nothing better to do than discover... with my kids. They'll learn the joy of walking.